What I tell myself when I'm tired
It's been a while since I've written - and here goes why. This summer I experienced ultimate highs and deep lows.
We had two deaths in the family. If I wasn't traveling, I was hosting guests at our home. I got to spend real quality time with people I love. But I also had no alone time (critical for my well-being). Plus, the world news. Combine all of that with poor sleep and you've got Stella turned into the Incredible Hulk (you know the raging green monster with ripped denim shorts from the 80s).
I was so worn down that I'd get migraines for days. It wasn't pretty. And I was useless.
This email isn't about self-care. And it's not about being burned out. (That may be a separate email or even workshop...stay tuned).
This is about what do you think to yourself, about yourself, when you're not performing how you'd like to be.
So here's my antidote to the inner critic who just gets off on what you should be doing, for the voice that makes you feel guilty that you're not doing enough...or just makes you feel like you're not enough:
Instead of dwelling on how much more I need to do, I pause, and I choose to focus on this question:
How am I making progress?
PROGRESS is about moving forward. It's not about HOW MUCH you actually move.
The question is a celebration or at least an appreciation that I made conscious decisions to improve my circumstances and live in alignment with my values.
Note: Key to this working is knowing what's most important to you and making progress on that. (If you're not sure what that is, just send me an email). Otherwise, you could just feel busy, overwhelmed, and like you're not going anywhere.
So basically, I stop measuring the miles between myself and my goals, and instead, I just appreciate the one inch I budged today.
[Notice, did a voice just go off saying, "an inch," that's nothing!]
But appreciating the tiniest movement, celebrating any crack of light I experienced, that's how I deal.
This is not just a practice I do when I'm worn down. I do it EVERYDAY. It keeps me sane. Otherwise, it's so easy to get overwhelmed with how much there is to do or with what's going on in the world.
Here's the deal: each us has the power to make the tiniest progress on what really matters to us. And to appreciate that progress. And if you just keep doing that - you'll notice yourself on an upward spiral of momentum again - and maybe, just maybe, making strides - effortlessly. And there you go.
Just thought I'd share a little trick. Hope it comes in handy.