Worried You Can't Handle It?
Our daughter, Linor, is now learning to crawl (time flies!) and I love watching her. Sometimes she grunts like a bodybuilder lifting seriously heavy weights.
She doesn't get discouraged; she just keeps practicing…and falling down and getting back up. And I could just watch her doing this for hours.
Now, I know the whole “learning to crawl before you walk” expression is a bit old and overdone, but watching Linor go at it in the literal realm gives it a new and deeper meaning in the figurative sense.
Babies and toddlers are magnificently simple: They don’t know about fear and self-ridicule and aren’t wondering how lame or silly they must look.
They also aren't worrying: "how I am ever going to run if this stuff feels so difficult now?"
In their early developmental stages, babies are wildly self-involved (in a good way!) and living fabulously in the present. So they don’t let anticipation of future challenges keep them from the matters at hand…and foot. Amazingly, we all started out like that! And then somewhere along the way, we learned about consequences—and that pure “infant innocence” was gone.
So that now, as adults, even when we’re learning something totally new—learning to crawl, so to speak—we’re not thinking about the next step, we’re fixated on how, and how well, we’re going to run the marathon, metaphorically speaking.
Know what I mean?!
I hear this concept so often with my coaching clients: They worry that they won't be able to "handle it"—whatever it is—so they resist trying something new or attempting a new direction (despite being unhappy in their current situation).
Now I know you know what I mean….
One woman I coach, who is also a new mom, is launching her own company after working years as an art director. She says to me, "Stella, I can barely make time to meet with you, how I am ever going to run this company?”
One step at a time.
With each baby step you take, you expand and your capacity grows. Who you are today is very different than the person you will be when it's time to run the marathon.
So if right now you worry you won't be able to handle the responsibility, the challenge, the time commitment, or maybe you worry that you won't have the energy, talent, resources, or maybe that your family might not be behind you...you are basing your assumptions on your current situation and perceived reality vs. the reality that will unfold in the future.
Your capacity for what you can do, handle, and imagine has nowhere to go but up, when you take even tiny steps of action. Trust in yourself.
My mentor says that confidence is earned, not learned. You can “handle it,” but you'll only find out how by moving towards your big vision.
Take a moment now and ask yourself:
1) Am I playing small in any area of my life? And if so, is it because I’m afraid I can't handle what I really want?
2) What's one tiny thing I can do to move toward where I really want to be?
3) What’s the worst that could happen if I just do that one tiny thing?
Want support figuring out your next three baby steps to playing big, and true? As always, I'm here for you. In fact, maybe our talking can be your first one tiny thing.
Send me an email to set up a complimentary 30-minute session. Do it soon! I’ll be on vacation in late May….
Looking forward to hearing from you guys!